One of them was this tree I have never forgotten in Florence. It was early in the morning and I was by myself behind the youth hostel. The sun was hitting the tree and therewas a stone wall behind it. It was so beautful and the moment was perfect and I can even remember what i was wearing. Every single sunny morning since then, I think of that tree when I look at the trees with the sun hitting them.
It sounds weird but it gave me this weird warm feeling, its a good feeling, but a weird feeling of longing for something and I didn't know what.
So now I'll jump to a couple years ago. I was driving to work at Organic in tears. I had the strongest desire to just stay home with Gianna. I was praying and crying and asking God to let me be home more with Gianna and any other children I may have in the future. I walked in to work and got let go about a half hour later.
I was kinda stunned and told my boss what I had just prayed on the way in and he was visibly touched.
My Mom was all worried for us. But I told her to not worry, that I knew this was an answer to prayer and good things were going to come from it.
So I had an AWESOME 2 months home with my baby, and then was welcomed back at Latcha and came back to good friends and am home 1 day a week more (and spend a lot less time driving). And somehow after I went back there, my co-worker Rudy told me he wanted to teach me to paint. I'm not sure how it came up, but I could draw but never had painted anything.
So in two lessons, Rudy taught me how. We were supposed to do more, but got too busy. I've painted probably 5 paintings, but I was really slow and meticulous.
Then the beginning of this year, I decided to start working out, and Jill happened to be back there doing the same. Jill and I have never really talked much outside of work stuff here and there, but we have really grown as friends and had an impact on each other this year. As we were working out one day, Jill was telling me how her husband always wanted her to go to this nondenominational church by their home but she never would go. She told me she had had dreams of walking around the building and peeking in all the windows but had never gone. I encouraged her to go, and they went that weekend, and have been going ever since and the kids love it and it has been a really good thing in their lives.
Months back I went through a spell where I got really sad again about working. I have to work, but I go through these periods where I want to stay home soooo bad. (I have to say since then I think I am over this. I've come to the place where I am grateful for my job, and trust that wherever God has me each day is his plan for me.)
But Jill really encouraged me to keep painting and make these scripture things I do, and to just keep taking steps forward being an artist, and even if it takes a long time, eventually I can be home a lot more with my kids. I've never really had the faith though that I could ever do that. My Mom always has! But I've always kind of blown it off.
Then she says, you're going to paint me a vineyard! I've never bought a picture for my dining room because I want something really special. And I said ok but was NOT confident about it. I've never done any kind of landscape, and I'm so slow. But she seemed to have total confidence I could!
(Also, about 4 months ago, I prayed about my memories from Italy. I felt weird even praying it, but I asked God to clearly show me why I always thought of that tree and the other place, and why they gave me such a feeling, cause it had to be something!)
I needed something to really inspire me to paint the vineyard, otherwise I knew I'd never finish it, so I decided on the tree in front of the vineyard. I did an olive tree for hers, even though I don't think the actual tree was an olive tree. It seemed to go with the vineyard idea though, and I came across this great explanation of the symbolism and analogy and biblical connections between olive trees and family.
It took me a really long time to do the background, mainly just the vineyard rows and little villa. I was really frustrated one saturday afternoon. It was going really slow and it was making me feel hopeless about doing anything with this stuff in the future. The thought of painting the tree and rock wall seemed like it was going to take FOREVER and I was ready to tell Jill sorry but I can't paint this for you. Its so hard to find free time with Gianna. But I got down on my knees and again cried and prayed. I asked Jesus to help me, because I know through him I was created and He gave me this ability and desire to do this! I said Lord, I know you made me to do this, but I can't painfully squeak out one painting every 6 months. Its killing me. And I know I don't have the formal training, but I know I can do anything through you.
I lifted my head, and there was a blank canvas leaning against the wall I had left there days before. I grabbed it and tears still falling, went to the kitchen and started painting and praying. Real loose and fast and I was painting my tree. And that day it came out beautiful!!!!!!! And then I finished Jills the next day!!!!!!!! Just tweaked them here and there over the next week.
The trees have matching hearts. The hearts represent the warm feeling that tree memory has given me over the years, my love for God and Jills family's growing faith and love for God, her love for her family, our new friendship that has meant so much in the last year, the answered prayer that I prayed from the bottom of my heart, and the new hope I have in my heart that I can do something with this gift God has given me, even if it takes a while : )
The woman at JoAnne's, when I went to drop off the painting to get it framed, had a really funny reaction to it. She held her hand over her heart and was like, oh, what is this and who is it for? And why is there a heart? And she dragged her hand back and forth across the wall and had a dreamy look on her face and I told her the story about the prayer and she was like oh my gosh, this makes me feel so.. but didn't have a word for how it made her feel.
And then yesterday, my co-worker Andy, who is a total jokester, walks into Jills office, sees
the painting (not knowing where it came from) and says in all seriousness, "Someone had a vision behind that painting. Thats not just a painting of a pretty place someone saw."
So cool. : )
And today Jill said it sounds kinda crazy, but I think you should incorporate the heart into all of your paintings, like a symbol for your love for God and the gift he has given you!
<3 it!
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